Connor Has Had Enough
by Casy Dee
Summary: Connor decides he's not in the mood to be Abby's doormat after the day he's had. He's homeless, Jenny died then quit, and he was almost turned into a Connor-sicle. Enough is enough. Ch 5 Up! Story Complete!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This takes place after what I affectionately call the Connor-sicle episode in season 3, episode 5. The premise is: What if instead of Lester walking in and finding out that Connor has been living at the ARC (since Abby evicted him for 'a few days' so her brother could stay with her), Abby finds out.**

**So I **_**love**_** Connor and Abby. I just _had _to figure out another Primeval fic for them. Thanks for all the suggestions folks! I have another one percolating, too.**

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Connor Has Had Enough

Abby had just gotten back to her flat at the end of another long day when she realized that she had forgotten her mobile back at the ARC. It had been a rough day, so she figured that she was likely due the luxury of a lapse in memory. Unfortunately her job made her phone absolutely necessary, or else she would have just left it. She retrieved her mobile and stopped into Sarah's office on the way out. Her light had been on, and Abby was curious why the Egyptologist was still working. Ordinarily the only person that stayed so late was Jenny, well, she did before she quit. Another team member down. At this rate, she and Connor were next.

"Sarah, what are you still doing here?" Abby asked.

"Oh! I didn't realize it had gotten so late, actually. I was just working on the artifact; I lost track of time. I guess it will still be here tomorrow. What are you doing here?" Sarah asked.

"Forgot my mobile. Rough day, wasn't it?" Abby smiled, trying to make conversation.

She wasn't anxious to go home and deal with her baby brother. She loved him, but he was trying her patience with his complete lack of consideration for her home. He was even messier than Connor, and unlike Connor, he wasn't the least bit apologetic, and he didn't confine his mess to his room. And Connor was never _dirty_ like Jack…leaving food bowls out and refusing to lift a finger to help wash up or even pick up his own mess.

"Yes, it was. Shame about Jenny leaving. But I imagine after hearing what happened to Connor earlier, and then her _actually_ _dying_ for a moment there…well, it's enough to make most people question how safe it is to work here, I suppose." Sarah rambled on as she gathered her things to go.

"Connor? What do you mean?" Abby asked.

"He got trapped in the lab. One of those diictodons of his was in there and he went in to fetch him. He spilled some saline and the fungus started reproducing itself again. He's the one that figured out that fire didn't work, and that we could freeze the fungus to death. Of course, we had to lower the temp enough to kill it off while he was still in there. He was afraid it would spread through the ARC…he refused to leave. He nearly froze to death. We weren't sure he was going to make it." Sarah related.

"I thought you knew?" She continued, noting Abby's horrified expression.

"No. He didn't say a word." Abby answered.

"I think he's still here, if you want to ask him about it. He's been spending an awful lot of time here. You know, come to think of it…he's here when I get here in the morning and he's always still here when I leave." Sarah noted.

Abby smiled distractedly and nodded, more shaken by the thought of Connor almost dying than she wanted to admit.

"Well, see you tomorrow then." Sarah said, turning to leave.

Abby wondered why Connor hadn't told her about his close brush with death; if anything, she figured he'd try to score a sympathy hug at the least. And why was he spending so much time at work? She headed to Connor's lab, determined to get some answers out of him. Ever since he had moved out, he'd been avoiding her when they weren't actually out responding to an anomaly. At first, she hadn't even realized it because she had been avoiding him out of guilt. She didn't like it…the thought that he didn't want to see her. He'd asked her today if she missed him yet…she did. She just didn't know how to deal with it. It stirred all sorts of uncomfortable thoughts in her…thoughts she'd been repressing for a _reason._

Abby walked past the still burnt out remains of Cutter's lab. She cast her eyes to the room to her left, spying movement, and then Connor's dark shock of hair. She peeked in at him around the edge of the door frame. He was telling the diictodons to have sweet dreams? _Why? _And it looked like he was getting ready to turn in himself. He had laid out a makeshift cot and blanket, and even more telling…he was standing there in only his grey shirt, his boxers and socks. Aqua blue socks, she noted with amusement. A carry-all and a shaving kit were stacked on top of the dog crate…he had been _living_ there. Why hadn't he told her?

He hadn't said a word when she'd asked him if he could stay somewhere else. He had just smiled and assured her that it would be no problem. As always, he had just gone along with what she asked of him, never complaining, never arguing. Why would he do that? Did he do it all for her? Just because she asked? Why didn't he tell her he had nowhere else to go?

"Connor?" Abby called out as she entered the room.

He stiffened and spun around, a ceramic mug in his hand.

"Are you living here?" She asked.

He swallowed, there was no sense in trying to pretend otherwise. "Yes."

He swept up his red jeans off of the floor and pulled them on, and then slipped on his boots. He didn't want to deal with Abby right now and her moods; her running hot and cold for him. He'd almost died today; Jenny _had_ died today, even though they had managed to bring her back. It had left him thinking about how short life was. He had watched too many people he was close to die already; when would it be his turn? Not long, knowing his luck. Abby was just another reminder of how much life he had missed out on because he was afraid to do something about it.

He'd leave…go somewhere. Get away from her.

"Connor…I thought you were staying at a mate's?" She asked.

He shrugged. "Fresh out, apparently."

Abby thought about it. He never hung out with anyone but her…not for a long time. She'd accepted his assurances that he'd find a place to stay because she had wanted to believe it. If she would have bothered to think about it, she would have realized that he didn't _have_ any other friends anymore. It's not like working at the ARC left them a lot of free time.

He turned his back to her to face the metal counter he had fashioned into a sort of makeshift kitchen. He didn't want to see her pity. She must be thinking 'poor, pathetic Connor. How sad he is…no friends, no girlfriends except for Caroline, and _she'd _been paid to date him.'

"Look…you can stay on the couch until you find somewhere." Abby offered.

Connor slammed down the mug on the counter. Abby flinched in surprise.

"It's just for a few days, eh? So I take it that you didn't ever intend for me to come back?" He asked, his voice tight and strained.

"Jack is my brother. I told you, he needed a place to stay." She explained defensively.

She didn't mean to take that tone with him, but she was edgy and uncertain of how she should deal with her feelings for Connor; it seemed to manifest itself as her lashing out at him. She always screwed everything up, every relationship she'd ever tried to make work. She didn't know how to act, and it scared her.

"You really don't give a damn about me, do you?" He asked bitterly.

Abby paused, taken aback. Connor didn't talk to her like this. What had gotten into him?

"What?" She replied, at a loss for words.

Connor threw the cup against the wall, shattering it. Abby jumped and took a step backwards. He spun to face her, seething. She recoiled from the look on his face. His eyes were hard and furious, his jaw clenched in a hard line, his hands balled into fists.

"What? Now you're afraid of me? Of pathetic, harmless Connor?" He growled.

He stalked towards her, and Abby's breath caught in her throat. He _was _scaring her. Logically she knew she could probably wipe the floor with him…but this Connor seemed to be a different person. It was as if he was possessed.

He stopped inches away from her, stared down at her intensely. His eyes pitiless and cold, so unlike Connor's warm chocolate kind ones. The veins in his neck stood out, he was visibly trembling as adrenaline coursed through him.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" She managed to get out.

"What's wrong with _me_?" He repeated angrily.

He'd show her what was wrong with him. Just _once_, he would do what the hell _he_ wanted to do, and the consequences be damned.

Abby gasped as he wrapped his arms around her, pinning her arms to her sides. He crushed her mouth against his, hard and passionate and needy. She froze, and then melted into it, unable to force her brain to think about what she was doing logically. She just knew it was _good_, electric and passionate and…this was _Connor? Connor_ setting her body on fire? She wanted to dig her fingers into his hair, pull him closer, but he held her immobile against him. She felt his thick erection pressing against her…she didn't know he had this raw emotion inside of him. She never knew. How could she not know he felt like this?

He let go of her abruptly and pushed her away in the same motion. He exhaled in a shaky shuddering breath and turned away from her.

"I'm finding my own place. I'll get the rest of my things tomorrow." He said flatly.

He grabbed his coat from the floor and walked out, leaving Abby without a backwards glance.

Abby stood there for a few long moments, shell-shocked, her hand pressed to her tingling lips. Her heart hammered in her chest. She had to go after him.

**TBC**

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A/N: First off…no, I'm not killing anyone off. They were just being pessimistic.

**I love me some angry Connor. We hardly ever get to see it. He's just so easygoing most of the time. After the day he's had, and sleeping at work, and everything else that happened that day…well, it was a good trigger. **

**O' course, he lost it when Stephen and Cutter stopped looking for Abby in the 'Mer' episode…mmm hot. And even that little flash of temper at Danny when Danny was still a cop and he chased them out of the house. I know. I have issues. **

**I haven't determined a concrete length for this one, other than to say it won't end up novel length like my Alice/Hatter fic. I have a couple of chapters planned out so far, but it will probably be determined by my muse and by reader interest. Soooo, if you like this one (or hate it), please do review. Reviews are love and they feed my muse. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Folks I _really _hope you like this…it was some tough writing. And all of you that reviewed and encouraged me, thanks _so_ much. You made Connor clamor for me to hurry up and get back to him!**

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Chapter 2

One of the nice things about working in the ARC was that any time Connor needed to get somewhere he could usually get one of the soldiers to take him where he needed to go. He wasn't entirely sure he was supposed to be taking the liberty to do so, but no one had denied him as of yet. He was doubly glad of that tonight when he had an urgent need to get away from the ARC as quickly as possible. He couldn't even allow himself to think right now…he just had to stay angry and _get away._

He got dropped off at a pub; he didn't usually drink much, but he thought tonight called for more than a cold Corona. He sat at the bar and ordered a pint and downed it, and then another. He was working on his third and his head was getting a pleasant buzz before he allowed himself to stop repeating all of the paleontological genus' he could remember over and over in his mind.

As soon as he stopped the litany, the realization of what he had said and _done_ to Abby came crashing down on him. He had probably just destroyed any chance he'd ever had with her…as if he'd ever stood a chance. He laughed bitterly and took another deep swig. She'd been pretty clear on that. The 'Oh god no, as if!' that she had said to Caroline when she'd asked if they were together came immediately to mind.

The offended and disgusted way that she corrected anyone that even suggested that he could be her boyfriend…the way she'd smirked when he told her women found him attractive...it all spelled out her utter disregard for him. She didn't even care enough about him to spare his feelings. And despite evidence to the contrary, women did find him attractive…but when he opened his mouth he usually lost their interest. That's why he'd been so excited about Caroline.

She had pretended to be interested in the same things he was…and she acted like she truly liked him for who he was. He could have had girlfriends, if he had the time (which he didn't) and the inclination (he'd been obsessed with Abby). He just didn't want to pretend to be someone he wasn't… he would not even do that for Abby.

He was tired of it. Tired of all of it. Tired of taking every backhanded comment with a smile and a shrug. Tired of being the one that was easy to push around…because he never pushed back. All he had ever gotten from it was a reputation for being an easy target. He had enough of the condescension and abuse. Abby heaped more upon him than anyone else; but he loved her…so he let it go. He always thought it was better to be her friend than nothing…now he had likely lost that. He ordered another pint.

All the thoughts in his head began to slow and go fuzzy as he saw the bottom of the glass. He lifted his hand for another. He never drank like this; he was afraid he'd get a call and he'd be unable to respond. He acknowledged the chance that this was a distinct possibility, but usually they had at least a few days between each anomaly. As poorly as things had gone for him today, he hoped that the averages would hold as he continued his search for oblivion in the bottom of a glass.

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Danny answered his mobile warily. An incoming call from the ARC couldn't be a good thing, and this was the second one he'd received tonight. The first call had been from Abby. It seemed that she had lost Connor somewhere and she was wondering if he had seen him. She said his mobile was ringing directly to his voicemail. He assured her that he was sure Connor would go home at some point, but that he would let her know if he heard from him.

This call was from one of the security crew at the ARC. He had spotted one Connor Temple getting right pissed at the pub that many of the ARC employees chose to frequent. He seemed to think that Connor was likely in imminent danger of passing out or getting arrested, or both. The man related that he had told Connor he'd take him home, but Connor had told him to get the hell away from him…he wasn't going anywhere. Danny had to ask him again if he had the name right, that just didn't sound like Connor.

The security man was going to stay and look after him while he was there, but he thought that it was a good idea if Danny came to get him. Danny sighed and said he'd be right there, and to keep Connor out of trouble meanwhile. He supposed this is what he got for accepting the job as team leader…babysitting duty.

Connor stiffened in anger as felt a hand on his shoulder…_again._ He'd already told that bloke he wasn't leaving. He was going to sit here and drink himself until he was proper sloshed, and he wasn't there yet. He turned to face the man with a snarl and blinked confusedly when he realized that it was Danny standing there.

"What're _you_ doin' here?" Connor slurred.

"I'm keeping your sad arse out of trouble. I'm taking you home." Danny replied.

"No!" Connor argued, and held on to the bar in a white knuckled grip.

"Look…you are coming with me if I have to carry you out of here." Danny countered.

"Abby kicked me out. I can't go home…don't have one." Connor disclosed resentfully.

It suddenly made a lot of sense why Connor would be sitting here all alone drinking himself into a stupor. It was as clear as day that Connor adored Abby; he'd seen that straight away. He had seen the way that Connor looked at her (and the way she sometimes looked at him), and at first he had assumed that they were together. When he asked Abby about it though, she had acted offended at the mere suggestion. Privately he thought that Abby was a stubborn fool not to admit that she felt the same way about him.

"She called me looking for you. Let me take you home, and then you two can sort this out." Danny cajoled.

"No. Just take me to the ARC." Connor insisted.

He stood up, almost fell down and staggered towards the door. Danny put his arm around the slight man and helped him out the door. First things first, he'd get him out of the pub, and then he'd see about finding him somewhere to stay for the night. He didn't fancy taking him to his place. He liked Connor well enough, and he wouldn't hesitate if it was just him in the house, but he lived with his mother. She hadn't been the same since his brother had disappeared. He tried to keep from upsetting her, and the strangest things could set her off. Connor certainly qualified as a 'strangest thing.' He got Connor buckled in and secured inside his car and started the engine.

"You can't stay in the ARC Connor, be sensible. Do you have somewhere to stay?" He asked kindly.

"I got angry. I got angry at Abby. I yelled at her and…I...lost my temper." Connor confessed, avoiding the question.

He paused, covered his face with his hands. His began to shake as he relived the moment…the shocked and _scared_ expression on Abby's face when he had stalked towards her. He never wanted…never imagined… that Abby _could _be scared of him. And he'd been so angry, and he couldn't hold it in this time. Couldn't shake it off with a shrug and a smile. He had just…lost it.

_He had hurt Abby!_ And he had…he'd…_assaulted _her! Pain constricted his chest, moved up into his throat, choking him. He fought back tears, the alcohol loosening his ability to keep reign on his emotions. This is also why he didn't drink to excess…he had a tendency to share more than he liked to. There were a lot of things that Connor would rather not talk about.

Danny let him get it out of his system. He got the feeling that Connor kept more hidden behind his easy smile than people realized, but he could hardly imagine Connor yelling at _anyone._ All the technicians that worked in his department loved him; he never got impatient or upset with them. He always took the time to explain anything they had questions on, without complaint. The ARC was more dependent on Connor than anyone realized, at least that's the impression that Danny was left with.

"I think I might have hurt her." Connor whispered.

At this admission, Danny stiffened. He grabbed Connor by the shoulder and shook him.

"What did you do?" He growled.

Connor swallowed and met Danny's angry gaze. He deserved it. If Danny decided to haul back and punch him he would just shut up and take it. He had no right to do that to her. _None_, he berated himself.

_But it felt good…and I enjoyed it,_ he thought. He felt like a monster. The worst sort of monster, because he had threatened someone that was his friend…someone that had trusted him.

"I yelled at her...and then I kissed her." He admitted.

Danny's anger dissolved and he gave a relieved laugh. He should have realized that Connor couldn't ever do anything violent, especially to Abby. He'd seen too much as a copper though, and he'd seen domestic violence cases from a lot less likely suspects than Connor Temple. It was one of the things he just couldn't tolerate. He was just glad that Connor was being overly dramatic, or else they would have had a problem.

"No! You don't understand…it's not funny at all! I grabbed her! I held her arms down, and I kissed her. I didn't give her a choice!" He cried.

Danny stared at him, considering. Abby could likely have gotten free if she wanted to, she was a tough one. He quirked his eyebrow.

"Did she kiss you back?" Danny asked.

Connor just blinked at him stupidly, but he saw the gears begin to turn. He leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes and tried to force his drunken synapses to connect. He replayed the scene in his head.

Connor nodded, finally.

She had…and enthusiastically. What did that _mean? _Connor wondered. His head began to spin again, and he regretted drinking quite so much. Especially regretted drinking so much on an empty stomach.

"If she kissed you back, I'm not thinking you did any lasting damage." Danny reassured him.

Connor's jaw tightened again. He breathed out in a huff. She could have stopped him. He had kissed her…she should have said something after at least. He was left with the uneasy conclusion that she didn't _want_ to like him, even if she had kissed him back. He just wasn't good enough for her…or she would have said something. She'd called Danny, but not him. If she wanted to see him, she would have called him. Well, at least he had finally _done_ something. The rest would be up to her. He was tired of the games. Life was too short.

Connor sighed. "Just take me back to the ARC, I'll find somewhere else more permanent tomorrow. Truth is I have been staying there for a while. Ever since Abby's brother came to stay with her. Just don't tell Lester, okay?"

Danny nodded finally and began to drive towards the ARC. "Tomorrow ask Lester for a day off, find a new place to stay. We'll call if we need you."

Connor nodded. "Thanks…and don't mention this to Abby, yeah?"

Danny shook his head. "I wouldn't dream of it, but you are going to have to get this sorted. I recommend being sober for it."

Connor gave a humorless laugh. "I think this is the first time I have had more than one drink in the last three years. It won't happen again…I know it's irresponsible of me, and I'm sorry."

He managed the apology without slurring too many of his words, but he figured it would have probably come off better if he hadn't sounded so inebriated.

"Later Connor, we'll talk about this later." Danny promised.

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Connor woke up feeling like a truck had run him over, backed up, and then ran over him again. Unfortunately, he wasn't a blackout drunk…he remembered every bit of the night before. He changed and ran some cold water over his face and brushed his teeth…tried to look a little less rough. He took a deep breath and headed towards Lester's office. He would be in this early…he always was. Connor fervently hoped Abby was NOT early this morning. She had been earlier ever since she didn't have to wait on him in the morning. He didn't want to face her.

The ARC was only sparsely populated as early as it was, but people would begin arriving within the next few minutes. Connor hurried down the corridor, eager to speak to Lester before he had too much of an audience. Lester was in his office alone wearing his typical perturbed expression as he read a stack of paperwork. Connor had never seen a man who came across as so perpetually bored, irritated, and condescending as Lester did. He had to work pretty hard at being so aggravated all the time. Connor had seen how much Lester got paid…he should be smiling. He stopped in front of Lester's desk and waited. After a few moments of waiting for Lester to acknowledge him he cleared his throat.

"What is it?" Lester asked, irritated at the interruption.

"I need to take today off. I have some personal things to take care of." Connor stated.

"No." Lester replied without even bothering to look up.

Connor ground his teeth. This was exactly the sort of thing he was tired of dealing with. Had it been Sarah, Becker, Danny or even Abby…then Lester would have said yes. At the very least, he would have explained why not. He kept his composure. Maybe Lester had a good reason for it.

"Why not?" He asked softly.

"What sort of operation do you think this is? You don't get extra days off, and you are lucky to get any time off at all." Lester snapped.

Connor's mouth thinned to a grim line. "You are telling me no?"

Lester sighed theatrically and finally looked up at Connor. "I'm feeling generous. Take an hour to do what you have to do, but I expect you to stay an hour later tonight."

No more. Not from Abby. Not from Lester. Not from anyone. He was fed up. He clenched his fists and took a step forward. He leaned over the desk to look Lester in the eye.

"I almost _died_ yesterday. _Jenny_ almost died. Cutter and Stephen _are_ dead…" He began quietly.

"Every day we put our lives on the line for this job, without complaint and without question. If I say I need a day off…" He paused for effect, making sure that Lester was giving him his full attention.

"I NEED A FUCKING DAY OFF!" He screamed.

Lester blinked, taken aback.

"Keep your mobile with you at all times. You are expected to report back here immediately if you are needed." Lester stipulated.

Connor swallowed and straightened. He gave one brisk nod.

"Of course." He answered and turned to go before his courage could desert him.

He ignored the openmouthed stares as he made his way back to his lab to collect his things. He knew there would likely be a price to pay for his outburst later…but he was finding it strangely liberating. Besides…he had got the day off he had asked for. Now he just had to find a place, a _cheap_ place for him and the diictadons to stay.

TBC

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A/N: You know… Connor never tries to change for Abby. As much as he adores her, he doesn't. I really like that about him.

**So, I think this chapter was so difficult because I want Connor to act in character, and he is pretty difficult to rile. I hope that I have succeeded in making it believable. Everyone has a breaking point, so he is at it…and I think Connor is way stronger than he gives himself credit for. Please do review? **

**(side note: Missing Reel for **_**Always **_**is next…honest)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So here we are…I think this one is a little different in tone, but I do hope that you enjoy it. Damn Connor keeps hijacking my brain. Thanks to all the people that have written such lovely reviews!! It inspires me to write, and the minute you take to tell me you enjoyed it means a lot to me. Okay. I'll shut up. On to the story.**

**Same morning as chapter 2 ends**

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**Chapter 3**

Abby wanted to head directly to Connor's lab as soon as she got into work that morning, but she idled hoping he would come to her. He had failed to answer her calls all night, and she didn't know what to say so she hadn't left any messages. Two hours later and she knew Connor would be at work…and she knew he wouldn't be seeking her out. She couldn't put it off any longer; she headed towards his lab.

She steeled herself for whatever reaction she would get from him; she still wasn't sure how to approach him. She was conflicted, frustrated and confused. She just knew she had to see him; she had to ask him what he meant by that kiss. She stepped into his lab after taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. No Connor. None of Connor's things…no diictodon carrier, no toothbrush, no sign remained that he had been living there.

She waited for a few moments, chewed her lip in dismay. After a moment's thought she headed into the tech department. If anyone knew where Connor would be, it would be one of them. She paused as she entered the tech area, feeling awkward and uncomfortable and completely out-of-place. She smiled at the pretty girl at one of the terminals, Grace Wong if she remembered correctly. Grace was usually the one that monitored the A.D.D. when Connor wasn't around, or was otherwise occupied. He said she was almost as good as he was at the technical intricacies that made the ARC tick.

Grace smiled back politely. "Can I help you with something?"

"Um, yes. Have you seen Connor today?"

Grace laughed. "I certainly did!"

Abby raised an eyebrow, not getting the joke.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

Grace stood up and leaned in conspiratorially. "I was there when he did it. It was _brilliant_!"

"Did what?" Abby asked impatiently.

"You didn't hear about it?" Grace asked incredulously.

Abby stared back at her, tamping down her irritation. "No. What happened?"

"Connor went up to talk to Mr. Lester first thing this morning, and the next thing I knew he was screaming at him! He yelled that he needed…" Grace paused… "'a f-ing day off'…and then he stormed out." Grace related excitedly.

Before yesterday, Abby would have never believed that Connor would yell at Lester. Of course, before yesterday her perceptions of Connor had been different. It seemed she didn't know him as well as she thought she did. Maybe she didn't know him at all. She refocused her attention on Grace…she was still speaking.

"…And then he just came in and said he would have his mobile if we needed him. You don't know where he is? But I thought you two were…um…it just seemed like you were a couple. Don't you live together?" Grace asked.

"Oh, god no." Abby answered reflexively.

She winced inwardly; that had come out harsher than she had intended. Grace shot her a disbelieving _look, _and not an 'I don't believe you aren't together' look...it was more like an 'I can't believe you aren't banging that.' _Odd, _Abby mused_._

"We're just mates, and he's not staying with me right now. My brother needed somewhere to stay so he moved out." Abby explained.

She'd explained more than she intended to, but she was still berating herself for the comment she'd just made in front of Connor's tech people. These people worked _for him_ for all intents and purposes, and she'd just belittled him in front of them. She wondered how many times she had done that without even thinking about it. No wonder he'd been angry.

"So you just kicked him out? What, you don't have a couch?" Grace asked indignantly.

Grace wilted under Abby's angry stare.

"Sorry. Sorry. Not my business." Grace apologized.

"So he took the day off then?" Abby confirmed.

Grace nodded and smiled. "You should have heard it!"

"Heh. Yeah. I would have liked to have seen that." Abby admitted.

"He's such a sweetheart! I didn't even know he cursed!" Grace gushed.

Abby smiled one last time and turned to go, defeated.

"Oh, can I ask a favor?" Grace asked in a low tone, her voice pitched for secrecy.

"Sure." Abby replied, a little uncertainly.

"Well, I thought you two were together, so I never tried…but since you're not. Um, well I know Connor would probably never be interested in someone like me…but could you put in a word for me?" Grace trailed off.

"He's just so _nice,_ and smart and really cute with that dimple and that smile...and those tight t-shirts of his...um, sorry. Don't tell him that part please! I just want him to know I'm...available." Grace continued awkwardly.

Abby stared at her in shock. Grace was sweet, extremely pretty and intelligent. Judging from the little fairy earrings clasping amber globes in her ears, she probably had a great deal in common with Connor. And she thought he was out of her league? Abby needed to seriously revaluate her views on Connor, it seemed.

The memory of his mouth on hers, his strong arms holding her while his body pressed against hers, his thick erection pushing into her hip proving he wasn't all boy…he was a man and he had a man's desires. When had he changed? When had he stopped being a goofy boy and turned into this? He had certainly gained in maturity, although he still had his moments. He had coordinated and directed operations when the fungus creature had been on the loose in the ARC…come to think of it, he had more and more often taken the lead during missions. People looked to him for guidance and respected his opinion. They had all listened to him yesterday about not touching Jenny until the fungus died. Even Danny. She remembered hearing his heartfelt pleas of 'not again' as Jenny lay dying on the table. No. Connor had seen and done too much to be a boy any longer.

His body had changed…she couldn't miss that when he was so close to her that she felt every taunt muscle. He had been working out with her for a long time…she had to be blind not to notice. Hell, she had caught herself checking him out when he got out of the shower a few weeks ago before she had realized what she was doing and_ who_ she was checking out. She swallowed hard at the memory of his glistening damp skin over wiry muscle, the towel casually gripped at his waist in one fist, his dark hair a wild mess.

She had been appalled to realize she had been staring openmouthed at _Connor._ She had snapped at him for using all the hot water if she remembered correctly. Her anger served as it always did; her ready defense for any uncomfortable feelings. He had grinned and apologized, taking her tongue lashing contritely although he hadn't done anything to deserve it. And that grin had stirred something inside of her...something she had tried hard to ignore.

Grace had been asking her a question. She ordered her thoughts, putting away the image of near naked wet Connor.

Abby nodded. "Sure."

Abby turned and stalked away, an uncomfortable _wrong_ feeling in her belly. She had just agreed to set up Connor with another girl. It should make her happy, shouldn't it? She needed to think. She needed to see Connor. Where in the hell was he? He said he'd get his things. She would bet he was planning on getting them while she was at work today. That would explain the day off. She called her flat, but got no answer. Jack must be out. She tried Connor's mobile again, no answer. Danny. Danny or Becker would know where Connor was.

* * *

Connor checked himself into a cheap hotel. It would do for a day or so, although it would strap his resources more than he liked. He would be short this month; he'd better warn his mum. He sat on the edge of the bed and took out his mobile, frowning at the number of missed calls listed. He saw the symbol that identified the ringer as in silent mode and sighed. Oops. He thumbed through the list, hoping he didn't miss any calls from the ARC. Abby had been calling, but no messages. Abby had been trying to reach him all last evening, a few times today. _Must not be important_ _or she would have left a message_, he told himself, searching for an excuse not to return the call.

He called Danny first and told him that he had found a motel to stay in temporarily, and he would be out looking for a flat. Danny wished him luck and told him he'd heard about him going off on Lester. Connor was a little embarrassed, but smiled despite himself when Danny congratulated him on telling off 'that pompous knob.' Embarrassment aside, he still felt like he had done what he had to. Lester had it coming.

Next he called his mum and told her he wasn't going to be able to send nearly as much as usual home this month. He promised to send as much as he could next month, and he fervently hoped that he could find a place as cheap to rent as Abby's flat had been. His mother lived off of his income. He was afraid she wouldn't eat if he didn't send home enough to cover her food and bills and what she felt was necessary to maintain her standard of living. She would dress well before she spent the money on food. Somehow she thought if she kept up the facade that they still had the money they did when Dad was alive then she could cope. It was stupid, but she was his mum.

She was understanding about the money…unusually so. Connor had made up a story about emergency repairs on his flat so she wouldn't ask too many questions. He worried about her. He had spent his life trying to smooth away the rough edges of life for her, to make everything easy. He had accepted her need to hold him to her, to take whatever she threw at him without complaint, understanding that the loss of his father had broken something inside of her.

He still remembered when she had been different. She had been soft and warm and comforting once. She had made cookies for him, and cooked big meals, and showered him with love and affection. She hadn't worried about status or importance… or about if she had run out of gin.

She got along well enough for the most part. He knew she loved him, even when she raked him with her sharp words. Even when she belittled him…he knew she didn't mean it. It had been difficult for her to let him go to University, but Connor had to get away and make a life for himself. He made a stand when he had to, even to her. She had accepted it better when he was able to send home his paychecks; she said she was proud her boy could earn his own way _and_ make enough to help out his mother. He had never been able to make himself tell her that he sent seventy percent of his pay to her.

He didn't know what to do. He missed his father. He missed Cutter. Cutter would have known what he should do.

Connor tried to shake off his melancholy. He was an optimist at heart, despite what he had faced in his life. He should have told her. He should have just admitted it to his mum that he couldn't keep sending her as much as he did. He was serious about being fed up with being 'nice' Connor. He accommodated and smiled and stayed unruffled while inside he was flinching. It was true that most of the time he didn't mind obliging other people, but his kindness had been mistaken for weakness. He liked to make people happy, and he was pretty easy…but somehow, somewhere along the way his easygoing nature had shifted into something else.

It was over, he was done. He would send his mum what he could afford, no more than twenty-five percent. She had a pension coming in; if she stopped her extravagant spending she would be fine. His mother was her own person, and he couldn't make her decisions for her. If she wanted to throw away her money on frivolities it would be on her. She would just have to be proud of him for what he had accomplished, even if he wasn't as successful as she thought. And if it wasn't enough for her…well…he was tired of being 'not good enough.' If it wasn't enough, it was her problem, not his.

And Abby…even thinking her name was difficult. If he had a brain in his head he would apply the same treatment to her, as well. He couldn't pretend that he didn't feel for her…_you love her, idiot. Just admit it,_ he scolded himself. Okay, he loved her. He loved her and she was his best friend and he had just overstepped the line that she had very carefully and emphatically drawn between them from the beginning. He would have to face her, and he would have to tell her how he felt.

He would tell her what she meant to him, and let her decide if he was good enough for her. He couldn't hold it in, not anymore. The dam had broken. If he wasn't…he would have to move on. The thought twisted his stomach and terrified him. Maybe they could even still be friends. If she cared about him, even if it wasn't the way he wished, she would understand. He sighed deeply and rested his still pounding head in his hands. And if not…well, that was her loss, damn it.

* * *

Abby went to find Danny. She knew Connor, and Connor would never leave the ARC without letting someone know where to find him. By the sound of it, he hadn't told Lester more than absolutely necessary. She cornered him in the security bay and motioned for him to come speak with her.

"Where's Connor?" She demanded.

Danny sighed and passed a hand over his face. "Why don't you call him and ask?"

"He won't answer." Abby admitted.

Danny knew this would happen. Now he was caught between the two of them, and they were acting like children. Well, he had just told Connor that he wouldn't tell Abby about his bender, not that he wouldn't tell Abby where he was. These two needed to get this problem between them sorted, and quickly. If they were still on edge like this and another anomaly hit, someone could get killed. Their jobs were too important to let pride and stupidity get in the way.

"What do you want him for?" Danny asked.

Abby looked up at him, uncertainty in her eyes. "I need to ask him something."

Danny nodded. "You two fix this…you hear me? I don't want either one of you on an anomaly response until it is."

Abby's lips thinned indignantly but she nodded her acceptance. She just hoped she could say the words that she needed to. She hoped that she wouldn't muck things up between them worse than they already were. She hoped she could…she just hoped.

* * *

Connor took some painkillers to try to dull his hangover and scoured the internet on his laptop for rooms for rent. He found a couple of prospects, but his choices were limited by the diictodons. He needed somewhere that was big enough for them, and strong enough to withstand their burrowing instincts. The thought about killed him, but he was starting to think he would need Abby to care for them. They would be miserable in a tiny one room flat. He had lost his home, he'd lost Abby (the small part of her he'd had) and now he'd lose Sid and Nancy.

He wanted to go home. _You don't have a home. Deal with it._ He told himself sternly. He swallowed down the pain, put it inside him. He wrote down a couple of addresses and rose, intent on at least checking them out. One of them was within walking distance; he would go there first. He double checked that his mobile was on ring, secured it in his pocket, and opened the hotel door.

* * *

Abby stood outside the hotel room door, chewing on her bottom lip. She took a deep breath, her feelings twisted and churned until she didn't know what she wanted or why she was here. She should have let him come to her and apologize…she knew he would eventually. Then she could just play it off that she had been shocked and upset with him, and then she would forgive him and he would be so grateful that he would never step through that line again. Never kiss her again…more passionately than she had ever been kissed… _And then he goes out with Grace and finds out you aren't such a catch and he could do better than you._ She told herself. What was she doing? She had to ask. She had to.

She raised her hand, her fist poised to knock.

No answer.

She'd missed him. She sat on the curb outside his door, head in her hands. He would be back, she would wait.

TBC

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**A/N: I hope you liked this one! Not so much angry Conner this chapter…I'd say angst-y Connor. Angst-y and resolute. I don't think he's got quite all of it out of his system…I'm thinking not. Mmm, I can see it. Yep, he's got a bit more coming. And if you like…(or not) please review! Reviews are love and Muse food. Happy muses write...**

**So I'm thinking that one doesn't get to be as un-rileable (my story, my word) as Connor without weathering some tough situations. I think it's his coping mechanism. I thought I'd give him some backstory...all I've heard about his family from Primeval is that he wouldn't shoot Abby or his mum. *snickers* And his Gran has no electricity...**

**Vermillion pt II, by Slipknot is musical inspiration for this chapter. Great song and perfectly suited. Man, that would make an awesome fanvid. *sigh* my talents don't lie in that direction.**

**New M rated Missing Reel is up for **_**Always.**_** It's chock full of lemony goodness. I think it came off very steamy. If you like it…please do review. It's called 'Show Me' and is set in Ch 48. It's not necessary to follow my Alice/Hatter fic to enjoy it…it's smut after all. *grins***

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Side/side note! New Season 4 Primeval pics! Squee! Link is on my profile or Andrewleepotts .com has about 10 of the best ones. Squee!


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Wow! Thank you kind reviewers! You have made my muse well fed and happy! Thanks so much. XD**

**I hope ya'll like this chapter…please tell me if you do (or don't).**

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**Chapter 4**

Connor reached into the pocket of his jacket to retrieve the address to the first flat. He knew approximately where it was located, but he couldn't remember the exact number. His fingers brushed lint, but no paper. He must have forgotten it on the table by his laptop back in his room. He sighed deeply and turned around. No help for it, he would have to walk back.

A small blonde form sat on the steps outside his hotel room. Abby. He took a deep breath and strode past her, stopped in front of his door to unlock it and pushed it open.

"Come in." He stated flatly, his back to her.

She didn't move. Finally, he looked at her; she sat looking up at him from the sidewalk.

_Abby, _he thought_._ Something like grief flashed behind his eyes before he covered it. He opened the door wider and stepped aside to allow her to enter.

Abby stood uncertainly and stepped into the dingy hotel room; she stared at Connor. He closed the door behind her quietly and stood with his hands in his pockets, waiting. He looked terrible. His eyes were bloodshot and his face grim. Her heart seized to see him so broken and beaten. Her Connor was always so cheerful, full of sarcasm and smiles and horrible jokes.

She raised an eyebrow and wondered how much Connor got paid. He had his degree, unlike her. She would have imagined that he made more, but he didn't live like it. This place should be rented by the hour. She took a deep breath and searched for words to begin. Connor continued to stare at her in silence, his face carefully blank of expression. She thought she had glimpsed a flash of…something…in them when she first met his gaze, but it was gone now.

Why did he make her feel like this! She was abruptly angry with him. This was all _his_ fault. If he'd not have kissed her like that than she wouldn't be dealing with this right now. She stared at his lips. They had been so soft…

"Danny said we are off missions until we fix this…weirdness." Abby declared, desperate to say _something._

Connor's jaw tightened. He nodded. Of course…she would have a reason for coming to see him. He had called it correctly. He wasn't good enough for her, and he never would be. His gut clenched and twisted as all hope died inside of him. He would never have her, and it was time to put away childish dreams and just accept it for what it was. _But I don't want to._ He thought.

"I don't want that." He replied softly.

"Me either." She answered.

This wasn't going the way Abby had thought it would. Not at all. She was mucking things up for them again.

"Grace…from work…she wanted me to tell you something." Abby spilled out before she could stop herself.

Confused at the sudden change in subject, Connor tilted his head in inquiry.

"Gracie? Is something the matter with the A.D.D.?" He asked worriedly.

"She wanted me to tell you she's interested…in you." Abby stated casually.

_Gracie?_ Abby thought. _He calls her Gracie?_ She fumed.

"Really?" He asked curiously.

Abby didn't know what she expected, but it wasn't the pleased 'really?' that she had gotten. In truth, she expected him to say something like 'but I want you.' Unless, of course, he didn't.

Abby was setting him up? That confirmed it for him. Abby clearly didn't want anything to do with him. He supposed he should be happy she was even speaking to him. He would try to move on…he had wasted too much of his life already.

Gracie was as good a choice as any. He liked her quite a bit; he'd just never looked at her _that_ way…not with Abby around. He loved Abby…he would always love her, but he was not some little puppy dog that she could expect to trail behind her in hopes of receiving a scrap of attention from her. He would do what he could to repair the damage between them that his fit of temper had wrought. He couldn't bear the thought of losing her friendship...it was all he had of her.

"I'm sorry for…yesterday. I just… It was a bad day. I didn't mean it. I hope we can still be mates after that." Connor managed to force himself to say.

Abby pushed down the wave of hurt that crashed over her at his words. He didn't mean it? He didn't mean it when he kissed her? Isn't that what she wanted? Wasn't it?

"It's fine. I heard you came pretty close to dying yesterday…I'll let it go. Never happened." Abby asserted.

"Good." Connor acknowledged and gave her a ghost of a smile.

It was the smile that did it. Connor's smile made her feel things she didn't want to think about.

"How soon can you get your things out of my flat?" Abby asked.

_So much for 'never happened.'_ Connor thought. He started to smile and promise he would try to get his things as soon as he could.

He started to. His mouth was moving of its own accord and his mind was slamming the shutters on the roaring in his head.

_No_. No more. He would not act as if it didn't bother him. It _did._ It _hurt_, and it was more than he could accept.

Abby watched a strange expression wash over Connor at her question. She didn't mean it, not really. She just wanted to sink in a barb because she was angry. No. Because she was hurt. She watched his eyes harden and flash at her. She regretted her words…it had been a push too far.

"I guess we are past 'never happened' then? Don't lie to me Abby. I'm not a child. If you want me out of your life, I'm out of it. I'll tell Danny we are fine, if you will. I can work with you Abby, but if you are going to treat me like this, you and I are done." He snarled.

Abby stared at him in shock, at a loss for words. How had they deteriorated into this? Connor was her best friend…had been.

"Fine. Get your things out by the end of the week or I will throw them out." She bit back angrily.

Connor growled low in his throat, a primal sound born of frustration and rage.

"Get. Out." He ordered.

Abby glared at him, tight-lipped and frustrated. She turned on her heel and left. Connor slammed the door behind her, shaking the frame on its hinges. He pressed his back to the door and allowed himself to slide down it. He rested his head on his knees and sighed. He tried to convince himself it was better this way.

Abby held onto her anger for a few kilometers as she drove away, but in the end she couldn't maintain it. Not with the pain she felt inside her chest, burning in her throat, stinging her eyes. She let the tears fall. She had lost her best friend and all because she had let her anger goad her into saying things she didn't mean. She deserved it…every word he had said. She had used him as her whipping boy for too long. She didn't blame him.

* * *

Connor recovered the addresses he had written on the slip of paper with trembling hands. He took several deep breaths to calm himself. The adrenaline drained from him slowly, leaving him weak and shaky. Despite this, he felt stronger than he had in years. He had done the right thing, even though it hurt. God, did it ever hurt. Connor was no stranger to pain; he knew it would fade in time, but he didn't know how he was going to face seeing her every day. He would take it step by step. First step…find a new flat.

The first flat had too much shag carpet (in fuchsia of all colors) to withstand Sid and Nancy. The second flat he looked at proved to be fairly promising, although it was smaller than he would like. The rent was due month to month, and it was a converted industrial building so the floors were cement…perfect for little diictodon feet. He could rent it for now, and keep looking for somewhere a little larger. He wanted to move in right away, and a few extra quid got him a key that day.

He called Becker and asked if he could send someone over in a truck to help him move in. Becker gave him a bit of a hard time about it, but in the end he sent someone. It didn't take long to get settled in, and Sid and Nancy were overjoyed to be allowed free rein to run about again. He had the security guy drive him to Abby's flat next.

Connor seethed inwardly about the condition Jack had left Connor's room in (and Abby's flat, for that matter). It was filthy, and the kid hadn't seemed to be bothered that the items in the room were not his to destroy. He collected as much as he could and loaded up the truck. He was sure there were things he had forgotten, but he wanted to be out of there as quickly as possible. This had been his home for the last three years, and it stung to have to leave this way. It had felt more like home than his own home had. He was glad to at least have the place to himself to pack up.

Connor dialed the tech department of the ARC; as he had hoped, Grace answered the telephone. He didn't stumble too badly as he talked to her. He used checking in on his day off as a premise to call, and then casually (he hoped) asked her to meet him for a drink after work. _She_ had sounded more nervous than him, and she had said yes. It felt strange to be meeting someone for a date, but he thought it was better than sitting around feeling sorry for himself. At least Gracie knew where he worked and what he did for a living; she was smart and funny and she was a _nice_ girl. He should be excited. He should be, but he wasn't. Still, it would be good to have a drink with a friend.

* * *

Abby reluctantly agreed to go have a drink with Sarah after work. Sarah had insisted after watching Abby mope around the ARC all day. She had heard all about Connor's episode with Lester that morning, and she wondered if it had anything to do with Abby's mood. Sarah just knew that Abby had been on edge recently. She had mentioned that her brother had moved in with her, and Danny had mentioned that Connor was out today because he was 'moving.' Sarah put the two together and figured she knew what had Abby on edge. A drink would do her good.

* * *

Connor sat across from Grace and wished he were somewhere else. On paper, they were compatible. As friendly co-workers they were compatible. But this…it was just awkward. If Grace would stop stuttering and acting like Connor was someone to be nervous around, it would help matters. Connor sighed and tried to put her at ease yet again. He wished she would just act like he was a person and _talk_ to him.

Connor steered the conversation to films she had seen recently; it was a reasonably safe topic that he hoped would loosen her up a little bit. She brought up that she was glad to see so many comic book heroes getting their own movies. She loved action movies, and she thought Wolverine could take Spiderman any day in a fight. Connor laughed out loud at this; he was reminded of when he had been practicing chat up lines with Abby. It hit him… that was the problem with Gracie…she wasn't Abby. She was sweet and pretty and interested in him, and he was tired of being alone, but this just wasn't fair to Grace.

* * *

Abby and Sarah sat down at the bar and ordered their Dos Equis. Sarah debated on how to bring up what had been bothering Abby without sounding nosy. She had always been the plainspoken sort though, so she decided to just ask.

"Abby, what's all this between you and Connor?" Sarah asked.

"What?" Abby replied.

"Well you have been moping about, and then Connor comes in this morning shouting at Lester and skipping out of work…and Becker told me that he sent a truck over to your place earlier to move out Connor's things. So tell me." Sarah asked gently.

Sarah braced to get her head bit off; she really did just want to help. At first Abby looked offended, but then Abby paled when she heard that Connor had moved out his things. Abby chewed on her bottom lip, glanced at Sarah's concerned face and sighed. Honestly, she needed to talk to _someone._ It wasn't easy for Abby to open up to anyone, it never had been…but she was losing her mind. She liked and respected Sarah, even if it was hard for her to reach out and make new friends.

"Well my baby brother came to stay with me, so I asked Connor if he could stay somewhere else for a few days…and it sort of turned into longer than a few days. I thought he was staying at a mates'. Turns out he was living in the ARC." Abby began.

Sarah raised an eyebrow. "And?"

"And I found out. I told him he could stay on the couch until he found somewhere else…and he just…he got really angry." Abby continued.

"Connor?" Sarah questioned.

"I know! But he was furious, Sarah! He said I didn't give a damn about him…he was shouting and…I don't know. I had never seen him like that before." Abby trailed off.

"Give him a little time. He had a really rough day…I'm sure he'll come 'round." Sarah reassured her.

Abby looked down at the bar. "There's more. He kissed me."

"_Connor?"_ Sarah repeated incredulously.

"Yeah." Abby replied.

"How was _that?"_ Sarah asked, expecting a horror story.

Abby looked up at her briefly. "It was _really, really, good._"

Abby breathed out a frustrated sigh. "But then he pushed me away, and told me he would find his own place."

"That's strange, even for Connor." Sarah replied.

"Yeah." Abby laughed humorlessly.

"So…you liked it?" Sarah asked.

Abby nodded miserably. "I think so. But it's _Connor!"_

"So? He adores you. Go tell him. You're Connor's dream girl." Sara suggested.

"Ahhh! I tried…sort of. I went to go talk to him and we ended up rowing again. He said he didn't mean it when he kissed me, and I said some stupid things, and he told me he didn't even want to be my friend anymore!" Abby lamented.

"Do you want to be with Connor or not?" Sarah asked, trying to put it into simple terms.

"I don't know! I don't even know what I want from him. I just know I don't want to lose my best friend." Abby admitted.

Sarah shook her head, and then spied the object of their conversation seated across the room…and he wasn't alone.

"Abby…Connor is here. He's with someone." She cautioned.

Abby looked at where Sarah nodded her head. There sat Connor, and right across from him smiling at him adoringly was Grace Wong. Jealousy gnawed at her guts; she finally acknowledged it for what it was. She didn't want Connor interested in other girls. She wanted Connor for herself. She just hoped it wasn't too late. Just then, Connor laughed out loud and flashed Grace his blinding bright wide grin, the dimple in his left cheek flashing. She wanted that grin aimed at her.

Connor was _hers_, had been _hers_ for years, until she started pushing him away from her because she found herself falling in love with him. He wasn't the same Connor as he was three years ago and she didn't know why she had continued to think of him that way when it was abundantly clear that he had grown into a remarkable man. A remarkable and _hot_ man. Why had she put him down and abused him when all he had ever tried to do was make her happy?

She had been terrified at the feelings he began stirring in her, and Abby didn't deal well with fear. All the stupid reasons she had been using to avoid confronting her true feelings fell away as she looked at him with another girl.

* * *

Connor glanced over at the bar and spotted a familiar platinum blonde head of hair. Abby. Abby was here…with Sarah? His heart pounded at he studied her.

"Connor?" Grace called out for the third time.

"Eh?" Connor replied.

"Abby said you two weren't together." Grace said quietly.

"No. No we aren't." Connor replied with a bitter twisted smile.

"You want to be, don't you?" She asked.

Connor laughed softly. "No. She doesn't want me. I'm not her type…she likes the action men."

Grace sighed. This wouldn't work between them. Connor was polite and attentive, funny and sweet…but his heart was already taken, even if he didn't admit it.

"Then why did she look like she had been stabbed in the heart when she just saw us together? Why is she wiping her eyes?" Grace asked gently.

"Really?" He asked, and the hope behind his eyes convinced her of the right of it.

"Gracie…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lead you on…I like you…but…" Connor stumbled over his words, trying to let her down gently.

Gracie chuckled and shrugged. "It's okay…but if you want my opinion, she doesn't know how lucky she is."

Connor blushed hotly.

"Thanks." He mumbled.

Grace leaned over the table and kissed him on the cheek.

* * *

Abby watched the pretty girl lean over the table towards Connor. Her head was in the way of Abby's view, so to her it appeared that she was kissing him full on the mouth. Abby was glad that she hadn't acted on her impulse to go to him. She had been about to go tell him…something. He couldn't be too broken up over _her _if he was snogging another girl in the corner. Abby stood up and fled the bar, Sarah following along behind her.

Connor stood, intent on going over to Abby and clearing the air between them. He would just tell her how he felt. He would admit it…admit he _had _meant the kiss, admit he loved her, admit that he couldn't stand the thought of losing his best friend.

He cast his eyes arond the bar. She was gone.

Three mobile phones rang. They had been recalled. There was a new one.

TBC

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**A/N: I know! Those two are sure frustrating, aren't they? Ah, more to come. **

**BregoBeauty made my much wished for 'Vermillion pt II' Fan Vid for this Fic! The link is up on my profile page! Please go check it out. (And thanks again!)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Well folks…am nervous as always about this one. Hope you enjoy. To all the folks that reviewed….THANK YOU! I love you! May you dream happy Andrew-Lee Potts dreams! (I prefer him wet, but your choice.)**

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Chapter 5

Connor answered his mobile with a sigh. It always seemed like these calls came at the absolute most unfortunate, inappropriate times. He wanted to find Abby and tell her how he felt while he was still brave enough to do it. Sometimes it seemed like the whole world was against him, at least against him and Abby resolving their problems.

He wasn't surprised to hear Danny's perpetually sardonic voice on the other end of the line.

"Sorry, mate. We need 'ya. We got a new one." Came Danny's insincere apology.

"I'm all moved in, anyway. I'm at the corner pub…can I get a lift?" Connor asked.

"I'll get you on my way in. You sort things out with Abby?" Danny asked.

"We can work together." He answered shortly.

He could only hope that she would be willing to put aside their problems until the anomaly was dealt with. She didn't want to be benched any more than he did.

"One hint of trouble between you two and you're out. Hear?" Danny stipulated.

"There won't be." He replied.

He waited for Danny outside the pub. He hoped he wouldn't ask him too many questions. He didn't.

The Forest of Dean was eerily silent. Connor and Danny hopped out of the truck and headed towards the anomaly site. The others would be joining them shortly; they were on their way.

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Abby hopped in her car and started the engine. Sarah had brought her own car; she didn't need to worry about her getting home. Abby just didn't want to face her…not with tears running down her face and smearing her mascara. The past two days had shaken her to her very foundation. She couldn't shed the persistent feeling of unease, nausea even. Her stomach had stayed tied in knots. Nothing seemed right. Connor was the fulcrum in her life, and without him everything was out of balance.

She had never seen Caroline kiss him. Connor had said that she had kissed him, when Abby wasn't around. She wasn't prepared for the gut churning pain that seeing Connor kiss someone else caused her. It _hurt._ It hurt her so badly that she couldn't breathe. Connor belonged to her. He was hers; he shouldn't be kissing someone else. And Abby had set them up. She was an idiot. If she was a better person she would let him have his happiness with someone else.

She wasn't.

Conner belonged to her, and she would fight for him. Connor was _hers_, and she was sick of pretending otherwise. She was afraid to lose him as a friend? Well, she had already done that, according to Connor. She didn't want to be involved with her flat mate? No problem…she kicked him out. She didn't like him in that way? Even though it took her a long time to realize it, Connor was smoking hot, his body taunt and fit, and his face had always been gorgeous. She _was_ attracted to him…had been for a long time. And how she felt about him…it wasn't just friendship. It was…something.

But Connor had moved on. He didn't want her or her bullshit any longer.

Her mobile rang…she was to meet the team at the site. They had a new one.

She took a deep fortifying breath. _After._ After they had this new anomaly sorted, then they would talk.

Abby parked her mini and quickly checked her face in the rear-view mirror. She licked her index finger and wiped under her eyes, smoothing the remainder of her eyeliner into place, she took a deep breath and exited the car. After they had the anomaly sorted, she and Connor would sort this out, she told herself again. She wanted her best friend back, even if he didn't want her as his girlfriend. There. She admitted it. She wanted to be his girlfriend.

She saw a sparkling light in the distance and headed that direction. She truly hoped that this one wouldn't take too long. They'd had a few responses where it was a simple matter of locking the anomaly, waiting for it to close, and moving on. If they got there before a creature incursion it was simple enough. Usually the team didn't even need to stay and watch it. Abby wished luck was with her just this once.

She came upon the site; Connor, Danny, Sarah, and a team of Becker's men (plus Becker) were already in place. Connor was inspecting the area surrounding the anomaly; he hadn't noticed her. She put on an impassive face and strode over to the anomaly.

"Creature incursion?" She asked nonchalantly.

"No. No sign of one." Connor replied, his voice flat.

Danny sauntered over to her, looked back and forth between the two of them.

"You two alright?" Danny asked.

"Yeah!" Connor replied.

"Fine!" Abby answered simultaneously.

They both forced smiles to reassure him. Danny didn't buy it for a second. He sent Abby and Connor off with Becker to look around a little more, and Sarah joined him to scout around the opposite edge of the clearing. As Danny and Sarah searched the ground for signs of disruption, eventually the topic of Connor and Abby came up. Sarah related how broken up Abby had been to see Connor with another girl, and Danny stopped and stared at her in amazement.

"That ignorant sod! I told him to sort this out with Abby…" He began.

Sarah laughed. "I don't think it happened. Abby said that he didn't want anything to do with her anymore."

"_Connor? _Connor told _Abby _he didn't want anything to do with her?" Danny asked.

"Yep. And then he was with that girl Grace from the tech department at the pub, and she kissed him! Abby saw the whole thing and ran out." Sarah related.

Danny sighed. "I told them they weren't to come out on any anomaly response missions until they took care of this…thing…they have going on. It's dangerous. I have a fair mind to send the lot of them home."

Sarah nodded. "Stubborn. Both of them."

"That pair set a new bar for blind and stubborn! We need to just lock them in a room so they don't have any choice but to talk to each other." Danny joked.

Sarah stopped and smiled. She raised an eyebrow. "That is a brilliant idea."

"You aren't serious!" Danny said.

"No. But it is tempting, isn't it?" She asked.

Danny rolled his eyes and smirked, but secretly he was in complete agreement with Sarah.

Connor stole sideways glances at Abby as they searched for any sign of a creature incursion. She was avoiding him. He couldn't even catch her eye. He tried not to be obvious; he didn't want Becker clued in on the problem between him and Abby. He knew that Becker would insist on them being pulled off of the field team…and the person most likely to be pulled off would be Connor. Every time he tried to close the space between them, she moved further away, and she was keeping close to Becker. Finally he sighed and gave up. He would catch her afterwards.

The team met back up at the anomaly; they all agreed that this one was as safe as they got. Connor locked the anomaly and left it in the security team's hands. If it dissipated sometime in the night, they would guard the gear until he came into work in the morning. Danny directed them all back to the ARC; he said he wanted the initial report filed before they went back home. Connor shrugged, it was Danny's team now, and he supposed if he wanted that sort of thing done right away he could do it. Connor didn't peg him for the administrative type though.

Back at the ARC, Connor cornered Abby in the locker room. She had filed her report, and looked like she was going to be trying to sneak out the back without anyone noticing.

"Abby…we need to talk." Connor said in a rush.

Abby looked down at the ground, she didn't want to look at him. She knew she was going to have to talk to him, but she hadn't worked out what she needed to say yet. All she could think of was Connor kissing that other girl. She wasn't ready to face him yet, but here he was in front of her. She was angry, but she was angry at herself. She had been the one to tell him to call Grace. None of this was Connor's fault. She knew it, but it didn't stop the words that flew out of her mouth.

"Nothing to say. Why don't you talk with Grace." She replied acidly.

Connor flinched. He was having a hard time holding on to his courage in the face of her steely voice. He took a deep breath and shut his eyes; he had to do this. He had to.

"I need to talk to _you._" He repeated softly.

"No!" She said, her voice simmering.

She pushed his shoulder out of her way and stalked past him, leaving a stunned and hurting Connor in her wake. _Stupid, stupid! Why did you _do _that! _She berated herself. How hard was it to talk to Connor?

She was going to have to face this problem head on, no more tap dancing around it. No more throwing up her shield of anger and cowering behind it. She just needed time to think first.

Connor set his jaw and stalked after her. He would talk to her whether she liked it or not. Abby headed for the animal holding cells, walking quickly. The lights flickered; a storm had rolled in and it had started playing havoc with the power grid.

Abby ducked into an animal holding cell, breathless from the quick pace. She didn't think Connor would think to look for her here, if he decided to come after her. She just needed some time to think!

Connor stormed into the room moments later, breathless from following after Abby. The lights flickered again and then died. The shutter slammed closed; it was a security measure in case of power failure.

Connor strode over to the shutter and banged on it. "Oi! We're in here!"

The ARC lost main power occasionally during bad storms. The emergency lights lit up the room dimly, but the worst part of losing power in the ARC was that the heat went out, too. The emergency generators kept all the security, personnel hubs, and electronics going, but areas like the holding pens weren't considered critical. Connor was glad of his hoodie over his long-sleeved t-shirt, but Abby was wearing one of her sleeveless shirts, and she hadn't a jacket. He hoped the power wouldn't be out too long, or this would be an even longer night than he thought.

Abby stood, watching openmouthed as Connor pounded futilely at the door. This part of the ARC was fairly secluded; that's why she had gone there. It was checked every morning on the security detail's rounds, but it was very unlikely that anyone would be nearby. They didn't currently house any creatures. They were probably stuck for the night, or at least until the power came on. She was stuck, locked in a room with Connor. That was just _lovely_, she thought sarcastically.

He pulled out his mobile to call someone to let them out, but with all the metal surrounding them, he got no signal.

He turned to face Abby. Well, at least she'd have to listen to him now.

"We're trapped. I haven't got a signal." He said.

"Arrrahhh! Damn it! This is all _your_ fault!" She hissed.

"My fault? How is it my fault?" He asked, his voice rising.

"If you wouldn't have started all this! Everything was fine the way it was!" She railed.

"Fine? Fine for you maybe! Not for me, but you probably don't care about that. Look…I said I was sorry. I had no right to touch you like that, and I know it. But you are the one that can't let it go." He argued.

"I did! I said it was forgotten!" She countered.

"Ha! Right! 'It's forgotten…now get your shit out of my flat!'" He mocked.

"Well obviously you were not too bothered." She sneered.

"What the hell do you mean by that?" He asked.

"You moved everything out already, and you were snogging that girl Grace in the pub. You didn't look terribly upset to me." She bit out.

"You told me to get out! And what do you care if someone is interested in me, eh? Did you ever think I might get tired of being alone?" He asked, his voice cracking on the last word.

Abby was silent, so he continued. There was so much he had been holding in.

"I'm tired of it, Abby. I know I'm not ever going to be good enough for you. I'll never be what you want. You have made that clear enough." He finished bitterly.

He felt the tears of frustration rising in his eyes and he tried to blink them back. He just had one more thing to say, if he could get the words past the lump in his throat.

Abby was frozen, staring at him like he was a freak. He would say it…and then it would be for her to deal with. He was _done_ hiding his true feelings.

"I miss you. I want you for my friend, at least…but I won't be treated like your…_pet_… anymore." He swallowed hard and looked her straight in the eyes.

There would be no misunderstandings this time.

"I love you. I wish you felt the same, but I know you never will." He said softly, his anger gone.

All he had left was the pain.

Abby's lower lip trembled. He looked so sad, so broken, and it was because of her. He _loved_ her. He had said it out loud…and he was staring at her like he expected her to slap him. She should tell him. She should tell him _now._ She couldn't make her lips move.

"I won't ever mention it again, okay? Just…I can't bear this anymore." He explained.

"I can't do this." He murmured, almost to himself.

He sat down in the corner opposite Abby, his knees pulled up under his chin, his head down. He was hurt and embarrassed. Some tiny little part of him had hoped that Abby might say she felt something for him too. Grace had said she looked like she was upset to see him with another girl. Maybe she had misjudged it. Maybe he was right, and Abby didn't give a damn about him. He pressed his lips together and fought down the tide of despair washing over him. He didn't see how much worse things could get.

Abby sat down on the floor and watched him, thinking. He wasn't moving; he just sat with his forehead pressed to his knees. She wanted to go to him. She wanted to explain that she was scared…scared of him. Scared to tell him she loved him. As the moments ticked by it got harder and harder for her to convince herself to go to him. She shivered in the darkness.

Connor's nose and ears were getting cold, and he knew Abby had to be freezing in her sleeveless shirt and skirt. He unzipped his blue hoodie and shrugged it off. He walked over to where Abby sat silently and draped it over her shoulders gently. He turned to go, but Abby caught his hand. Startled, he turned to look at her. She pulled him towards her; he knelt down next to her.

As he got closer he saw that she had wet tear tracks on her face. His heart clenched to see her cry. He started to reach out to wipe them from her face, but froze before he touched her. She wasn't his to touch.

"Sorry." He whispered and made to move away.

She caught his hand again. After all that, he was worried about her being cold. Connor was the sweetest man she had ever known, and if she kept it up, she _would_ lose him. Time to come clean. She pulled him into a hug, winding her arms around him to hold him close. He stiffened, and then melted into the embrace. She thought she heard him sigh as his arms tightened around her.

"I was scared. I didn't mean it, all those horrible things I said. I was scared and I lashed out at you. Connor, you are my best friend and I love you. I treated you badly because I didn't know what to do about how I felt about you. I'm sorry." Abby whispered into his ear.

Tears streamed down her face as she clung to him. She only hoped he could forgive her. She didn't deserve it…didn't deserve him.

Connor felt the dampness on his cheek, but he wasn't sure if it was from her or from him. He couldn't believe the words that Abby…his Abby…was saying to him. He pulled away to look at her; he gave in to the urge to wipe her tears. He moved in closer to her, slowly so that she could move away…but she wasn't moving away. She was moving towards him. He brushed his lips over hers softly, to gauge her reaction. Abby wound her hand into Connor's hair and pulled him deeper into the kiss.

Connor responded heatedly, full of passion and desire and love and disbelief that Abby was kissing him. Abby shivered at the intensity within Connor. She broke off, a little breathless.

"Abby?" He asked.

"Yeah?" She answered.

"We're okay now?" He asked, studying her face.

"I think so." She replied.

She put her arms through the sleeves of his hoodie and zipped it. He put his arm around her and pulled her into his body. She leaned her head on his shoulder and let him hold her. It felt good. It felt right. She had her Connor back…but knowing Connor…She didn't want any more misunderstandings.

"Connor? You know that you're my boyfriend now, right?" She asked softly.

"Am I?" He replied.

"Yes." She nodded.

"Does that mean I can kiss you again?" He asked.

"You can kiss me as often as you like…where'd you learn to kiss like that anyway?" She asked.

She figured she owed him the compliment.

Connor blushed but smiled. "Dunno. Natural aptitude most likely."

Abby laughed. She had missed this. She had missed him.

"I thought you were going to kiss me?" She asked.

Connor kissed her, and kept kissing her until they had to break for air. Abby found that his natural aptitude extended into other areas, as well.

The lights came on after an hour or so, but Connor and Abby hardly noticed.

**END**

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A/N: Well there we go. I hope that you enjoyed this little fic-let of mine. I am hoping after all the build up that I resolved things to your satisfaction. Yes? I have really enjoyed torturing Abby…I mean…um…no, that's what I mean. Really…get a clue, girl! Hot!Connor!

**I hope you take the time to review this if you liked or hated it….. :) Reviews feed my poor hungry muse. She's an addict, I tell ya.**

**Vanilla212-thanks for the 'lock 'em up' plot bunny. *grins* I cackled when I read that in your review...**

**I've got another Primeval one in mind…I'm calling it 'Jack Gets Some Karma' in my head, but I don't know if the title will stick. Fairly dark…might get M-y…don't know yet.**


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